Dave's Negative Blogs

Quick Update

You can now download the entire album all at once here:

http://cid-83919c46a065e03b.skydrive.live.com/browse.aspx/Helbm1%20-%20Dave%20Ives?lc=2057

It took me all day to figure out how though.

Its .RAR

Hazaar!

Right, its been a work in progress for a long time now.

My debut electronica album is out today!

For free download no less!

You can download it track by track here: http://www.last.fm/music/daveives/Helbm+1

Would love to hear what you all think of it!

(Best listened to in the dark...its where it was written)

Also here's me : Blog.co.uk exclusive!

The truth is out there.

I am a huge X-Files fan. Most people who know me know that. But most people who know me also know I am not easily taken in by conspiracy or paranormal things without a substantial amount of evidence. When it comes down to Religion I always feel like there is essentially no evidence for most things stated therefore believing in it isn't a good way for me to go.

But aliens?

Now I'm not about to destroy all my credibility by stating I believe in aliens. I actually hate the word "belief" People always say "I believe in this" or "I believe in that" but what the hell does that actually mean? It certainly doesn't mean you KNOW anything. I could say that I believe the universe is actually a giant glass of water and our planet is a meatball floating in it, but that doesn't do anything for anybody does it.

The thing about paranormal activity is its so vague. You have ghosts, aliens, big foot, nessie, El Chupacabre and God knows what else, so although I won't actually say I "believe" in any of these things, I WILL say that i find certain aspects of all of them interesting.

As human beings there is a lot we don't understand, but for me the concept of U.F.Os seems the most likely.

The only reason i say this though is because for me personally the thought of a infinite universe where the only intelligent life is here on Earth is a very, very depressing one. It also seems a bit arrogant to presume we are the centre of the Galaxy just because we invented the light bulb.

Just remember I'm not saying "I Believe" Okay Mulder?

I'm very much on Scully's side when it comes to this. I keep an open mind but try and not jump to any rash conclusions.

But i think it is fair to say that most people in their lives have experienced something big or small that they can't quite explain, and for a lot of people it drives them crazy.

For me the main offender is Deja Vu and my dreams, and i have to say i have very strong feelings about them. The way they make me feel especially Deja Vu is more than irregular. For me Deja Vu is like that "unnamed feeling" its like a mix of sickness, confusion, mystery, joy, longing and dissapointment. You feel like you have lived something before and can even at times predict the next things that happen but the sequence continues too quickly for you to actually say them to prove its happened. Also it can happen at the worst time, say when you're in the shower or getting on the bus and there's no one to tell.

I'm off track now. I was originally talking about U.F.Os.

I have definitely seen a UFO. That doesn't mean i have definitely seen an alien, but i have seen an aircraft i couldn't explain.

Also about 2 nights ago i woke up at around 4 am and remember in the half asleep daze seeing that my windows were unnaturally blue. Now i don't want to go too much into this one because it holds no water really, but i try to base everything off of how it makes me feel and this made me feel uneasy. it was too early for light, especially of this brightness. Needless to say it creeped me out. But being the lazy fat cunt i am, i just went back to sleep. Got no time for probes.

Anyhoo, the point of this was to ask for all your perspectives on the cases of U.F.Os or Deja Vu (or any other paranormal shit you think you have seen)

Just let me know!

Behold, for Brighten Call-eth!

That's correct folks, on Saturday I spent the day in Brighton in Hove and before you say anything, Yes, I am aware I was there only but a few months ago but I gotta admit to you folks, I find myself wanting to go there more and more often.

Me and my girlfriend set the alarm for 8am Saturday morning and were awoken to the shrill, bossy, Female voice of my Mobile phone informing me “The time is Eight AM, Time to get up!” That's right, it actually says the time AND shouts “Time to get up!” all in a Northern accent no less. Well we hauled ourselves out of bed and after a healthy breakfast (A chicken sandwich) we made our way to the train station. The last time we went we travelled by National Express coach which I highly recommend. It costs £1 there are £1 back and it really is the easiest way to travel, but seeing as we were only going for a day, we wanted to get as much time in as possible so we opted for the old fashioned train. £21 later, and we are on our way to Brighton.

After falling asleep on the pink train I awoke to find myself one stop from Brighton station. When we got off the train it was pissing down and the skies were grey. Depressing? Not at all. The thing I notice about Brighton is, despite the greyness of the skies, the place is still the most colourful of all places I have visited (and I'm not just talking about gay pride flags) There's this strange upbeat mood about as people carry on doing what they do knowing it will probably clear up by midday. It's a very multicultural place, and I really don't know where London gets its title as the most multicultural place in England because I really think Brighton gives it a run for its money.

Because the weather wasn't at its best we just explored the town. Through “the lanes” and various shops there's a lot to be found. Its all pretty alien actually. We walked through a free “Test your Aura” centre. It wasn't really my scene though. Maybe a bit too “far out” for me, but it was fun to see. We went in a lot of “tat” shops and for some reason they all have “I love london” merchandise in them despite being no where near London. Then we had probably the best pizza's ever in Donatello's. If you're ever in Brighton go to Donatello's. You can get a 2 course mean for £6 and its wicked. On the way back to meet some friends we found a little art exhibition made of paper called “the elephant bed” which was pretty cool.

After that we met up with out friends and went to a few pubs. We found a “Club” that had just recently “re opened” although it didn't look like much restoration work had been done. Its hard to find a pub in Brighton central that isn't a gay bar (not that we were looking) so we just presumed it was. It had very pretentious Banksy-esque artwork on the walls and the door had a pink banana on it. The soundtrack was hard underground electronica and apparently the “dance floor” was downstairs. Now I have seen some shoddy toilets in my time. I have been to “the Dirty South” in Lee Green, but until Saturday I had never been to a toilet with Saloon doors. After coming out of the OK Coral Toilets I decided to look at the “Dance floor” which turned out to be a black dungeon with some UV lights. As I ascended the stairs I was greeted at the top by a man of about 35 – 40 years in age wearing an orange tutu and tights. A real life Fairy man. Now despite what you may think, Brighton isn't actually as “gay” as everyone will have you believe, but this ladies and gentlemen may have been the gayest place we have visited so far. It was reasonably early in the day so we left that club and went to a quieter pub where we talked about movies and the like.

On the journey home I couldn't help but think that Brighton was the exact kind of place I would like to live someday. I love London, don't get me wrong. But after living here for 19 years you kind of want something different. For me Brighton has the perfect City to Beach ratio you could want. It has a great high-street with all the consumer focused shit a Londoner like myself needs along with a great stone beach and pier thats literally right around the corner for when you want to get away from it all and the best thing about it is that if you never turned that corner you wouldn't even know the high-street is there.

So in the short, if you want somewhere great to go in England, go to Brighton. Just go by National Express and not extortionate train. You Could literally go 11 more times in National Express for the price of a 1 day return on the British Rail.

Just beware that Fairy man. Don't enter the club with the pink banana on the door.

I'm a shit i know. I never come on here any more really. I've gone and abandoned you all for the devils anus that is Twitter!

NO! never! i could never abandon you all! I wouldn't. I'm still here! I have just been pretty busy, and because of that not had time to think of anything good to write about on here. The thing about Twitter is that you can post things without thinking. So while I'm sitting at my computer screen trying my hardest to progress on my screenplay and get my mind to actually generate something of any sense, i can take a break and inform all my 13 followers exactly what it is i am doing at that precise moment which is usually "Updating my twitter" for some reason. Creative no?

Basically what I'm trying to say is this site is too good to fill with shit like that. I've not abandoned you all, I have just had nothing of any interest to write on here, and i don't like to update it without anything of any value.

BUT if you are at all interested in my non filtered thoughts then do check out my Twitter at : www.twitter.com/fattymombassa

But don't hold your breathe.

I hope i will find something of interest to write about on here soon.

In the meantime i seriously suggest you watch "Stewart Lee's comedy Vehicle" on the internet somewhere (its all on youtube) and watch "Psychoville" The new comedy drama series by 2 of the 4 league of gentlemen guys Reece Sheersmith and Steve Pemberton. I advise you view it from episode 1 somewhere on the web because it is an ongoing series and if you start now you'll be lost i assure you.

Thanks!

Here it is. Michael Jackson is dead. The thing everyone knew would happen eventually but never thought it would happen yet...

...The only reason i say this is because he was such a martyr already. He didn't even need death to be huge, he already was. This blog is in no was a disrespect to him dying. I'm not glad about it however I'm in no way mourning.

I was never a huge fan of Michael Jackson's music (give or take some songs) or his general commercial status (Pepsi and so on) or his obvious God complex. But one thing is for sure, the man was huge. He meant a lot to a lot of people (and he meant too much to others, like those guys that collect his bogeys at concerts and get their own nose jobs to look like him) And that's why I'm writing this, because i may or may not be responsible for the death of Michael Jackson (depending on what you believe)

The other day me and my friend were walking to the shop discussing Michael Jackson. We were harmlessly (or so it seemed) discussing what it would be like if Michael Jackson were to die. Not just because of his upcoming tour but just in general because of the sheer dedication from his fans. All I'm saying is I'm sure Michael Jackson has a bigger fan base than Diana originally did, so we need to prepare for a mourning overload...and possibly a fountain.

So if you happen to believe in the possibility of Jinxing somebody, then you could say I might have had something to do with it all.

Anyway, i'm in no way am claiming i am glad he's dead. I'm not. He was an amazing singer and performer and he's going to be missed by many fans and obviously his family (who i can't speak for) It's quite a shocking thing when you find out a favourite musical artist has died. You feel sad, and you feel strange but at the same time you don't ever want to cross over into mourning because its just not realistic to mourn as you would for a family member or friend. Its weird. You never actually knew this person.

Never the less, he will be missed by a lot of people.

I read an article in the London Paper regarding Euthanasia today. It got me really annoyed. Apparently, if you help somebody commit Euthanasia, you can face up to 15 years in prison. What kind of backward way of thinking is this? It makes about as much sense as locking up drug addicts. It doesn't help people.

In my opinion, if someone wants to die they should be allowed to. If its a case of manic depression then yes theres no reason why psychiatric help couldn't be recommended. If its purely because life isn't going you're way at that particular time but theres a possibility of it all turning around then perhaps, suicide isn't your last option but, one thing that cant be cured with the likes of psychiatry is say … a terminal disease, or perhaps arguably worse, a life hindering disease that may render you immobile and vastly unhappy with your living condition. If someone decides that this was not their intended and preferred way of living I think its all within their own power to do something about it.

I think the thing that gets me angriest is the pure audacity of the government, just handing out laws to suit their own “moral” motives. Who is to truly say whats moral and whats not? The church? Aren't they supposed to stay out of politics? This is even more unjust than the abortion debate because theres surely no argument here. You are dealing with one body. Yours. And as for “assisted suicide” as they so carefully put it, its a consensual thing between 2 people who obviously care a great deal about each other to have the strength to go through with such a thing. We are all for nurses turning off life support machines in hospitals, but when it comes to choosing whats best for yourself there seems to be some huge taboo. We are all for getting our bodies pumped full of morphine and painkillers but when it comes to self medicated “illegal” drugs we don't seem tog et a choice.

If we don't have power over our country as individuals I would have thought we would still be allowed power over our own bodies.

If I want to stick a heroin needle into my eyeball, then I should be damn well allowed to. Its all very “sweet” that the government “cares” about us enough to FORCE us into submitting to their laws like Jack Nicholson being strapped into his bed and given harsh electroshock therapy in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, but I would prefer not to turn out like he does at the end, vastly in need of euthanasia.

I been thinking a lot recently about censorship. Well actually I think about it quite often, but today its been a little more than usual.

Anyone who knows me will probably also know that I am very anti censorship. A lot of the time when people hear you are against it they will accuse you of being selfish because they think I don't care about what children have access to on the television but I think if people really “have” to censor things on TV they are choosing the wrong content to manipulate. Too much focus is on swearing and graphic imagery. As far as swearing goes, words are just words at the end of the day no swear word has ever physically hurt anyone. In terms of graphic imagery most people are desensitised and even most 7 year olds can tell you whats real and whats not on television and in films. As far as high school shootings go, I think if you feel the need to blame a piece of media as apposed to your child's blatant yet obviously overlooked mental instabilities you should be questioning your parenting skills rather than if your child listens to Marlyn Manson. When I switch on the television every couple of months or so, the thing I see that deserves censoring isn't the word “fuck” but more the shallow and brainwashing nature of MTV produced programming and reality television. Now I'm in no way stating these “should” be censored. I just think they deserve it a little more. In terms of damaging your children these things have a bigger and more long term impact.

But why all the censorship towards adults? It always amazes me when news reports on war censor the images of the destruction. Not to want to sound sick or anything, dead bodies aren't exactly my number one thing to see on television (you would never get me to the bodyworlds exhibit) but I cant help but feel slightly insulted and molly coddled when it comes to that particular front. I think too often the censor companies use children as an excuse for everything they do. “Won't someone think of the children” ect.

War is a horrible thing. It should be reported accurately as such. I can handle it. I know I can. I won't enjoy it, but at least I wont feel like I have been wrapped in a warm blanket of white lies and tucked into bed to dream about how peaceful the world is.

Next Blog Subject: Army Recruitment Advertising

As I am sure you have gathered by the title, I am frustrated as Fuck. If you can even technically be as frustrated as a “fuck”? Yeah, I suppose you can be. Well I fucking am for fuck's fucking sake.

I am frustrated with mobile phones. Not other peoples though. Mine. Its a fucking piece of shit. Its been giving me real troubles for the past couple of weeks. For some reason the lame little “touch sensitive” buttons under the screen have decided to only work when they want. This wouldn't be a problem if they didn't control access to ALL FUCKING MENUS on the phone. Today they finally decided to completely pack up and it couldn't be worse timing. I went out and got a special sim-card for calling abroad because my girlfriend is in Morocco at the moment and now I cant call her. What's more I bought a £10 top up voucher today as well and I swear to fuck it was on my fucking bed about 20 fucking minutes ago. Now where the fuck is it? I have no fucking clue. I know they expire in 24 fucking hours and now I feel like a fucking character in a bad fucking cop film who only has 24 fucking hours to defuse a fucking bomb. Fuck!!! AHHG!

Sorry about that, I really needed to vent the frustration because otherwise I might snap the phone in half, the flimsy, cheap, self expiring piece of Samsung turd. Is it just me or does Samsung really suck? My friend bought 2 Samsung cameras from Argos and both were faulty.

Well I'm going to march to Orange tomorrow and buy the cheapest pay as you go phone I can. I have never liked phones, never liked their cameras, never liked their designs, never liked their ringtones and I never fucking well will.

On a lighter note, I bought the book “Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea” today and have just about read the first chapter. It really is great considering it was written about 100 years ago. 39 pence in my local charity shop? Bargain.

So I suppose there was a slight upside to this fucking fucker of a fucking day ...

... Fuck!

Sometimes in your life you have to say “Fuck it” Some people say “fuck it” on a regular basis. This isn't good. You cant over use your “Fuck it”'S. You don't have an unlimited supply of them. I unfortunately am one of those people who hasn't used a lot of their “Fuck it”'S. I have quite a few left but haven't used many maybe because I think too much. Over analyse. Who knows.

I used one a few months ago when I decided to quit the JSA. It wasn't a huge “Fuck it” but it was a “Fuck it” none the less. They wanted to put me on a 13 week course and I said “Fuck it, I'll have to go without the money” Because for some reason these Job Seeker's Plus people presume that because you're unemployed you also have absolutely no life at all and no other commitments than getting a job. The course was 5 days a week 9 – 5 for 13 weeks. I won't go into huge detail about certain commitments I have at home but lets just say that a so called “course” where all you do is search for jobs in old newspapers and on-line didn't seem to take priority over said commitments. I'm struggling financially at the moment but I do have an iota of pride left.

My most recent “Fuck it” though was regarding education. The past year has been my naïve “I'll take a year out education and get a job” year. I did indeed take a year out of education however the latter part was not as successful. One positive though, was that the year out gave me some time to think about what I wanted to do with my life. I have always loved music and did a course on it for 2 years but I didn't feel fulfilled. I will always love music and write something new every day, but I felt that in terms of education I needed to turn my back on it. I feel like I have gone as far as I go with musical education without it depressing me. Granted, theres a lot more I could learn about music and maintaining a higher level of instrumental skill but after the 2 year course I felt like I had made a mistake.

I recently applied to a university course on the subject of “Film and television production” because I realised it was where I wanted to go in life. It made me feel bad though, like I was a traitor to music. I also feared people wouldn't take me seriously in it because I had never shown any educational interest in it. To be honest the only reason I didn't take it at school was because my school wasn't renound for it and it was considered a bit of a cop out subject. But when I received a letter informing me I had an unconditional place at the University I finally thought “Fuck it” and went for it. I'm starting in September.

Music is definitely not forgotten for me though. How could it be? It's my life. I cant pretend and tell you between film and music one is more important than the other because its not true. I love both, and I will always work with one or the other, or even simultaneously. I will continue to write music and I will continue to make films. Then I will make music for films and then I will make videos for music. Then I will write things. A book, a script, a play, a poem who knows? I think the main thing I'm trying to get across here is I hate the way we are always made to choose. “You can either do this, or this.”

Well what if I want to do it all?

Fuck it.