When it comes to the news i pretty much like to keep my nose out. Me and the news do not like each other. We just dont get on. When the news talks to me it can be patronising towards me. Basically i dont watch the news. I also try not to read the news. I try not to look at news on the internet (except movie and music news but you know im talking about "important issues") Your probably aware that i glance through the SUN newspaper from time to time but obviously thats only through curiosity as to what minority they are choosing to make fun of that week. I swear Jim Davidson edits that paper. Anyway my point is that i keep a long way away from news.

I dont avoid the news because i dont want to know whats going on in the world. As a matter of fact i have a huge interest in that, except i just dont like the way its presented to me. If there was perhaps some way that every update of news could be directly transmitted to my brain through some kind of futuristic wifi technology then i would be happy...provided it was advert free, presenter free, un bias, not aimed at a "hip young" audience and would go away when i wanted it to.

Avoiding the news (and most television) for a couple of months has done a great job in maintaining my sanity but obviously i have no idea whats going on in the world. Just today i was asked what i think of the "Russia and Georgia" situation and i didn't have a single clue what the hell they were talking about. the words rung a bell...but not like a Church's bell but more like a hotel reception bell. I was stumpted. I was so stumpted that i didnt even bother making up an opinion like "i dont like it at all!" i mearly just pulled a face of utter confusion and dread.

In a way though i dont mind. All the news does to me is make me paranoid and totally petrified. In reality all the news is, is a list of all the possible ways the world is going to end. Its just a group of people behind the scenes who all sit round a huge table and think of ways were going to go. "I think today we should talk about the possibility of the polar ice caps melting." "no no no, we need something bigger. i know lets talk about terrorists harbouring new ice melting technology to melt the polar ice caps" "Perfect!" "oh and we can lighten it up with a piece on a piano playing cat!"

And besides even if you tried to find out all the news in the world it would never be ALL of it. Theres always new news in some respect. Updated, re debated, re edited, re edited again, disproven ect.

I'll see how long i can last without it although im sure curiosity will entise me back to the television and i can start fearing whats in my back garden again.